The Alternate Energy Cookbook

I had been talking to Anjali the whole of yesterday and yet was left with a desire to talk more, "can't have the cake and eat it too syndrome," speaking of which I should have got her birthday cake on her birthday but had decided against it.  Her birthday had come and gone, we had fought two months before that and on her birthday I was left with a bittersweet feeling, I wanted to wish her and yet knew she wouldn't talk to me.  So I bought her a gift and kept it packed, "Oh and what fun it was," knowing how much I wanted to visit her and yet just holding back till things were better.  Yesterday I had spoken to her as if I was simulating a birthday, "like I knew Tom from Jerry," and it left me wanting a whole lot more.

I am an emotionally sensitive person and to see her happy made me happy, "isn't that sweet ?" my mother would say and yet I knew it to be the truth today, speaking of which, my mother herself is a very sweet person till she sees an injustice happening somewhere, then she is as wicked as the Queen of Persia with her knives.  Last she was at the supermarket with Anjali, she had seen a kid almost being trampled upon by a runaway food trolley, she had jumped over the guard rail and was at the throat of the errant man, "I might be an old woman, but if that kid gets hurt, you are dead mister."  The man had backed down immediately and apologised and she along with Anjali had gone and bought the kid some chocolates and made the man pay for it.

I had popped into Anjali's house in the morning with flowers, she had never got flowers from me and was elated, I cooked her breakfast and took Romeo for a walk allowing her to eat in peace and by the time I was back she was getting ready for work.  She lived in an apartment, two bedrooms and the works, she loved her place and worked hard at making it a beautiful place to stay in.  On and off, depending on her moods she would invite somebody over for a meal and talk to them like the mad hatter.  She was "April" to me, not too cold and not too hot, just the right shade and a perfectly balanced woman who could give you advice on your life based on her experiences of which she had many.  She made you whole just by talking to you and when she spoke to you it was like you would see the flowers bloom and the sun shine and the birds chirp.

After she left for work, and I was on leave, I cleaned up the place and sat down with Romeo to muse about what next, it was like when she went away, the world came to an end, Romeo and me were in the same boat, missing the thought of her and waiting for her to come back home and take us in her wings.  We played "find the cuckoo" and some other games that he liked to play, "like licking my face till the cream went off the cake," and it was evening, time for Anjali to return home.  She came home with a spring in her steps,"and we both were waiting to spring onto her," welcome home! how was your day! and all the other phrases that we humans, "and Romeo was almost there now," welcome people we love back to our homes.  It had been a great day.
Sometimes We Alternate Between a Dream and Reality.

I had been sleeping for over thirteen hours now, everyday that came for the past one month had been nothing new and yesterday it struck me that since I had the time why not use it to rejuvenate my mind.  Sleep told my mind, "sometimes it speaks to me," and for once I agreed with it, I had slept at 6 pm the last evening and got up around 7 am the next morning.  For the sleep deprived it was nirvana,"a opium bash hard to beat," and I had woken up with this "nothing" feeling in my head.  I had missed my appointment for the morning walk with Anjali as a consequence and knew she understood, "damn I hated missing these sessions," there was always tomorrow I told myself and that is how I had lived my life and would continue to live it.  The doorbell rang at 7:00 am, "it always damn well did," the maid was in to cook breakfast, and I had a headache, I walked down to open the door, normally I am a lazy bum in the morning, "hop from place to place," till somebody gives me tea.  She made tea for me and cooked some breakfast, I hopped on into my old sedan and rushed for my first meeting.

Anjali called around 10:30 am to ask how I was feeling and when she called I would anyway feel absolutely fine,"and damn she knew it," I told her I had a headache and was immediately recommended a medicine which I picked up from the medical shop,"that too while I was on the phone," her recommendations came way ahead of anyone else's, she had been my doctor, business advisor and secretary all rolled into one,"didn't I say I had a bread roll for breakfast," when she asked me to  focus on my personal life now more than work, to start organising the time I would spend with Shalini, mom and father.  My parents had always been non-intrusive, they meant well and knew me to be a quiet man of music,"don't I love this term," though I didn't do too much of listening nowadays except in my car.

At the end of the day I was left with a feeling of wondrous joy, it had gone all very well, except for this dull ache that told me that I had missed my morning session with Romeo and Anjali more than I would care to admit.  This life wasn't bringing me too much of happiness these days and I loved the work and travel more than anything else, it sorted things out in my head and made me feel real and connected.  Anjali had in fact in the past asked me to totally immerse myself in it and not worry about my past life, what was gone was gone, what remained was this feeling of togetherness and I wouldn't give that away for anything.  Relations, "and I speak about the blood ones," gave me no happiness, they left me with a sour taste in my mouth, the only thing that mattered today was newness with which I met each person in my life,"definitely unlike my blood ones," it made for far more sense to leave family complicated and friends uncomplicated, I would carry on with Anjali and not ask her to change, I would instead be just her today and see it till the end of the day.
Makes Sense To Uncomplicate.

It was a lovely Sunday Morning, just the right shades of clouds and a quiet gentle breeze blowing, it hadn't quite brightened up yet and something was missing.  I stared over the parapet wondering what that was and suddenly realized what it was, the cuckoo of course, "damn how did I forget him," this bird that woke me up everyday at 5 am wasn't there, the crows were cawing, running helter skelter, left then right, up and then down, but the cuckoo was no where to be found.  There was confusion all around, and this small bird was the cause of all of it, "where are you ?" all of them seemed to be asking.  I looked back to see Anjali walk in with Romeo, "this darling always made my day," Romeo had grown to his full size in six months and a giant leap from him could flatten me, "not that I minded," he was playful, full of zest and energy.  Anjali too seemed to have quietened down now, Romeo had played his part, "and he damn well knew it," this Golden Labrador was going places as far as I was concerned.

Anjali saw the disquiet written large on my face and asked me about it immediately, "she knew me well," I mentioned something about not having slept well, as I still stared at the tree where my friend cuckoo would always sit, it was 6 am he should have been around, Anjali decided to make tea, and I decided to sleep for another 15 minutes but Romeo wouldn't let me, he nuzzled me and then poked me, " get away my mind seemed to be telling him," but he wasn't one to give up, he too sensed Anjali that I was thinking of something else.  On a hunch I decided to walk out with Romeo for a short stroll, "the tea could very well wait," this Golden sniffed its way through the bushes and the short plants, he pulled me to the garden nearby and we sat there waiting, "I knew what I was waiting for," but what was Romeo waiting for ?  Thats when it came to me that the Golden's have this sense where they can pick up your worry and then they go about their own sweet way of solving your problem.  Romeo had sensed mine, something was amiss is all he knew, as he pushed me to look at the roses and its green thorny stem and stiff leaves while he scratched his tail.  Thats when I let go of the leash and allowed him to have a free run, he nuzzled the flowers and then turned left and then right again, looked back at me and then went ahead to the fountain.

I followed him and found him intrigued by the pigeons who were tailing each other in circles, my reverie was suddenly broken at the fountain when I heard, "or thought I heard the familiar sound of the cuckoo.  I looked up at the green leaved trees, still didn't see anything but the sound persisted.  I found Romeo was staring at me in jest, he wanted to play with the pigeons, I quickly took his leash and we walked back to the house, Anjali was waiting up on the balcony with the tea and I rushed up, eagerly anticipating something and lo behold', on the same old tree sat my cuckoo.  It worked out all well, the walk had eased my mind and I had found my friend, a little late today, maybe he had had some errands to run early in the morning.  I sat down to have a large cup of tea and patted Romeo while I listened to Anjali talk, "which was my favourite hobby nowadays anyhows," while the cuckoo played its sweet music in the background.
I might have witnessed the heavenly opera today.

"As I moved my three wheeled Cycle Rickshaw Dumpster to the next house, I could see the inhabitants barely up, moving around in slumber, the maid had just arrived and the house was waking up, it was 6 am in the morning, it was my job to get the trash out of their house and dispose it off.  I was deaf since birth and because I was deaf I couldn't speak, I had barely managed to get this job through the President of the Welfare Association and despite the fact that it was lowly it was all I could manage."  

The person I write about above in first person is a real person, Subhash, a cleaner and garbage collector in a residential colony in New Delhi, where I stay, he probably stands out as a live example of how unfeeling a society we are, "like I care," a common phrase heard all across Delhi, as long as I get to eat my McDonald burger, kids go to public schools and my life is all OK, I am not going to be worried about how the have nots work their lives.  Some years back Subhash just appeared in our lives from nowhere, a hardworking person, very dedicated and eager to work, he was employable like nobody else we knew.  So what if he couldn't hear and speak, he had this urge to work and make something out of his life, and that is an extremely important quality in anyone, every single person I know who works for an employer and does well at work has this quality.

Fortunately for me, I had the opportunity of interacting with Subhash, I don't know even a bit of sign language and there was a comedy of errors trying to communicate the first time we tried to, I soon realised he needed someone to emulate, so we put him on a job that allowed him to follow someone around and see for himself the work that needed to be done.  One week of apprenticeship and he was ready to do the job singlehandedly.  He was up in the morning cleaning the area of leaves and debris of the night before at 5 am in the morning when no other help was around and then he was up for garbage next at 6:30 am, picked it up from at least 50 houses and delivered it to the collection bins.  By the time it was 8 am, which was the normal reporting time at the base, he would have already completed his morning assignment, would report to the supervisor, eat some breakfast and would be looking to help others complete their routines.  The rest of the day would be filled with work in the garden and some more cleaning up and his duty finished at about 3 pm peppered in between by meals.

His remarkable fortitude and perseverance has brought him praises from nearly all residents of the colony, as a matter of fact there have been numerous times when his name has been mentioned in the "achievers" list in the colony.  Its been two years since he started work and what he has achieved with his life is commendable, which just takes me back to a video that I saw on youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ai3XTLyGboQ by Ruma Roka, sponsored by Franklin Templeton Investments partnered the TEDxGateway Mumbai in December 2012 which talks about the very same thing.  It is an incredible experience trying to relate to Subhash and in a country where poverty breeds beggars, as you would understand, it would be easy to resort to it rather than work.  Young kids are taken from the street because the only thing that makes their poverty suitable them for is begging, especially if a kid is deaf and can't speak then there is a distinct possibility that he would get maximum earnings while begging.  Nobody knew what Subhash had done during his childhood, but obviously it had been a tough one, he bore signs of neglect and apathy, he was uncommunicative sometimes, his normal enthusiasm would wane and he would become wary.

Once when I asked him to go to a particular home to get their annual subscription, he refused, he shook his head twice and gestured with his hand, he obviously didn't like the family too much, they had made fun of him before and he wouldn't fall into the same trap this time, and who was I to question his logic.  I allowed him to take his own decision and wiser for that, people do this all the time, deride and derogate others that are different, and in doing so fall into a trap of their own making, a deaf may not be able to hear what is being said but there is enough intuition to understand derision.  Subhash stands out as an example of somebody who despite adversities of deafness and his inability to speak therefore has come out shining in his walk of life, albeit not by choice.  Educate him and many more like him during their childhood and they would be ready to take on the best by the sheer dint of their hard work and single minded focus and contribute to society in a much more meaningful way.
I learnt focus and perseverance today.

The morning had blossomed into a classic, the Sun was out, the pigeons were sighing and the myna birds were chattering as usual.  Anjali had got up to a great morning, I was still sleeping when she asked me if I wanted to go for a walk, "wish I didn't snore," I wanted to walk, my mind told me, but the body was stone cold, it wouldn't get up.  I was peaceful after last night, a culmination of a peaceful resolution of a one week old fight with Shalini, it had been a war of words, "and when she spoke you had to listen," followed by six days of silence broken finally last night when we had kissed and made up.  The last five days hadn't been easy, normally my relation with Shalini was as easy as the blue jeans and me, we talked when we wanted to and talked for hours, she cooked delicious continental and I tried my hand at the soup and bread, we would sit and eat together at night and forget our worries of daytime.

Communication was so important to me, I couldn't believe a world where there was none, Anjali and I spoke about my dreams for the future when we spoke one on one, we both shared a smoke and drank a bit, and then spoke in details.  The first step was to change the lifestyle, maybe start a new diet, even buy a new car.  Having known Anjali long enough, I knew it was important for her to connect to my dreams and feel that both of us were trying to resolve something in each others life.  She was the one who told me how to resolve my fight with Shalini, and I had taken her advice and a solution had come soon enough.  Anjali was a maverick, she wouldn't budge if she was right nor give in to injustice, she spoke out whenever she felt the need to express herself, as a matter of fact I had placed her on a pedestal and she hadn't fallen off it,"didn't think she would either," our relationship was stormy to begin with and now after a few years it was peaceful and totally relaxed.

I spoke to her everyday and discussed our lives, what happened and what would happen, just last night when I spoke to her she had mentioned that she was not too comfortable in her present job, it was too tiring and made her moody and cranky, "I had noticed too," everyday brought a new confusion, some days she would be happy, other days just plain sad and worried, still other days would bring irritation, work played such an intrinsic role in our lives and good work environment went a long way in enhancing life.  Anjali had helped me work out methods to deal with life itself, and I was a very quick learner, drawing inspiration from her life and using it to create a vision for my life with Shalini.  It be said that if I had not learnt from her I would still be that same person I had been for the past few 10 years or so, an aggressive go getter with no feel for emotions and parallel reality.  Anjali and Shalini were the exact opposites and yet the two most important people in my life today.
Methods and Methods to control emotions, I have seen some.

The noise in the morning was reverberating, there were the milk vans with their noisy inmates, "damn folks talk too much," the cars humming away in the service lane, it was 6 am in the morning, "where were all these people headed," too early for all these noises, "wasn't there a way to dull these noises," my thoughts went back to my engineering classes and the case study of the benefits of installing double panelled windows, "loosen your wallet a bit mister," it sure would bring peace of mind.  I and Anjali sat on the balcony sipping tea, it was cloudy, maybe the sun wasn't out as yet or maybe my eyes were playing tricks on me, Anjali was dark in complexion and the weather resembled her skin today, "poetic aren't we in the morning ?" I had made some fresh tea, the green leave variety and was sitting content.  Her Golden Labrador was sitting at our feet, exhausted after the brisk walk in the nearby park and trying to get its breath back.  The morning session with her, I had begun to enjoy, we had started this five months back and now it was a regular feature of our lives.

This balcony was new renovation to the house, two pillars had been erected to support it when the house had been renovated, I loved the balcony, it was my daily succour when times got rough inside the room, "sitting on my hiney," I had just started to spread some greenery on it as well, a creeper that came from the ground floor right up to the room and potted plants.  The Golden Lab, Romeo, "aptly named so," was  in love with this place, he would smell the floors and play with the pigeons that landed on the parapet, "could they really understand birds."  He wasn't just a Lab, he was a constant companion during these times to Anjali and she was going through a rough patch, "certainly not as good as it gets," but things had improved drastically over the last few months, the depression of the past was gone, "she was over him," and was beginning to enjoy life much more than she had in the past few months.

Our relation had changed too, from one of casual acquaintance to a bond, a bond that came from having both gone through a rough emotional patch in life, we were comfortable in our skins with each other and tried to support the other with warm words and genuine hugs.  I had learnt so much about honesty from her that I was prone to blurting the truth on every occasion, even the white lie didn't come easy to me now, "isn't that strange?" for someone who had lived his entire life in one lie or the other, there was a strange comfort now in talking to her.  I could have been her other Labrador for all you know and lived peacefully in some corner knowing that she would speak to me and call out to me,"whenever it was time for a walk," life had changed colours since I had met her, parted and then made a comeback again and I hoped it remained the same now.
The Two Hues of Comfort - Trust and Honesty.

I had met Anjali when she was going through a phase in life, she was 10 years younger, "age be damned or so I thought," but the energy of youth, and the enthusiasm, it was addictive, the verve for life and the need to meet new people, it all came back to me.  I was old in the mind more than my body, my moodiness and crankiness were sure signs that of that, "over the hill huh ?" we hit off like the icing and the cake, loved every minute of my interactions with her, she could talk about Timbuktu all the way to the moon and I listened and listened and listened, "nearly falling off the moon."  Her voice was sweet timbre to my ears like the thought of sunshine in rain and we would ride my sedan, "didn't I say it was as old as me," till the end of the night.  The thought that I was falling love occurred to me, especially in the mornings when she would meet me while walking her Golden Labrador and I would just wish the creature wasn't around, till I realised that I wasn't in love but I was in love with the thought of being in love.

Anjali had the special knack of honesty so rare in human beings nowadays, "don't they talk so much without speaking," she could talk on topics ranging from Dating and Relationships to Heisenberg's Theory without so much as batting an eyelid, uncertainty was never in her mind, she knew exactly what to say and how to say it, "all facts and figures in place," the rarity of meeting someone as honest as her had me stunned for a bit, I was on cloud nine and placed her on a pedestal, "for someone as old as me," that was a rarity too.  Then it happened, we had a fight and she was angry enough to disappear from my life for a 4-5 months, and now I started to miss both her and her Golden.  It wasn't as if I was in love with her, "like she was either ?" but we miss people we like and there isn't anything more profound statement than I can ever make, and if I was in love with her then she had made it abundantly clear what her thoughts were on that, "it was a one way street mister."

I started to go out more often now and was meeting more people, "this loneliness it sucks man," during this time I met more and more people of her age group, it was like all of them wanted me to listen, "like I was enjoying this part with them," I met guys and gals, all her age group, "and I wasn't even seeking them," and one particular guy stood out, he was a brash young guy with lots of attitude, "like the proverbial bat in the night," we would ride his car that was filled with paraphernalia ranging from cigarette lighters to bottle openers and a great music system to boot, when the music blared it shook the small car totally, "ahoy battle stations !" , the guy seemed like a fighter and he reminded me a bit,"only a bit mind you," of Anjali.  I went around with this guy for two months, seeing movies, male bonding and stuff before Anjali came back into my life, "its a miracle."
Its all in the mind.

I had been waiting in my car for 5 minutes when the phone call came.  How I came to be at this Metro Station was a mystery to myself, "like there weren't other mysteries in life," I had driven out about an hour back from my house, it was a Sunday evening about 4 pm when I had left my house, I had driven aimlessly, "as much as a tired hiney without a seat," for about 1/2 hour before I realised where I wanted to go and when focus came I had revved up the engine,"revved up? damn this sedan," and reached out for my destination.  There was very little traffic on this Sunday, "people were probably home watching TV," instead of watching the street, Sundays are really off days for most here, they sleep till late, got up and did nothing, "like they have been blessed," later watched movies and went to sleep again only to get up, eat and then sleep again.  There was precious little to do in this city on a Sunday, "like there was much normally," I was zombie looking for directions, just before I reached the destination, the mystery unfolded.

The 3 km stretch that now was between me and my destination, "and some stretch this," it was a tree lined avenue with at least three signal stops, one after each kilometre,"why did they put the signals at all," I preferred free flowing, in any case the avenue was blocked preventing me from reaching the dargah, a holy place which was frequented by people from all religions, "and we do pride ourselves as a multiplural society," I turned the car around in a quick U-turn and started to drive down from where I had come, it was then that the call came, now I am not a religious man but I did know that this call was important, it was Anjali and she sounded distressed, she was headed to a party and didn't know how to reach her destination, "like I knew today," however she was going to come to the exact metro station I was standing and get on a train for her destination.

I was shocked, I hadn't told her I was going to be here and yet she was beaming in on this one, "could there be more to life than I had seen," the mystery was waiting for me to unfold and yet I kept quiet, did not tell her what my location was and continued talking and five minutes later I found her getting down from the auto right in front of me.  Now her shock mirrored mine, "and this sure was turning out to be one heck of a Sunday," she quietly got into the car and we started driving to her party, I wasn't invited but I sure as hell was going to drive her down there, I loved talking to her and like I said before, I was going to be exactly what she wanted me to be for the rest of my life.
This is my life to love

So here I was looking out of my window when suddenly it occurred to me, it was time for rain and though it had rained a bit in the night, the leaves looked sparkling clean, and drops of rain that splashed the leaves glistened in the sunlight, "like it really mattered to me," I was looking out of the window hoping to catch a glimpse of her.  I had done this routine, "if I might call it that," for almost two months now, "at least I damn well got up in the morning," and I was eager to speak to her now.  Now I am reasonable guy and wanted to find out for myself the stuff she was made up of, "did she look that good up close after all," for all you know she may turn out to be engaged or worst married.  I watched the dumpers go by along with lots of cars, "there were always cars," the human race was absolutely crazy about cars and then I spotted her in the distance, I jumped out of the apartment, for the first time regretting that I was on the seventh floor, "damn it took all the time to get down," normally the view from the floor was stunning and that's what had made me rent it out, it took me 2 minutes to reach ground zero and I rushed out of the block and waited at a lamp post, cigarette in my hand leaning against it and looking into far of space.

As she approached my heart beat increased, but I stayed poised and puffed a drag, now I could hear the clicking of the heels on the pavement, and their intensity increased as she got in closer, the click clack on the cement was sweet music, just at the right moment I looked up, and froze, "like I had  never seen ice before," she was walking staring at me, our eyes met and stayed, "what is it about drama that I like," my tension had heightened, I enjoyed the feel of watching her and my mind approved immediately, "nowadays it didn't enjoy too many things," and then the moment passed as the "click clack," receded on its way away from me. My mind told me I would do this again, it was worth the moment, often enough we seek pleasure in doing things while there may be more pleasure in sitting it out and wait for the right moment to do things, till then it is a wait and watch and sometimes the "watch is worth the wait," as it had been this time around.

I walked into the cafe open early in the morning for breakfast, there were few customers, "I liked it like that," the waitress at the counter I knew for a long time and I chatted with her for 10 minutes before taking my breakfast to the table.  Seema, intuitively seemed to know what to do and she spoke to me like a friend nowadays more than customer.  It occurred to me that restaurants were to people nowadays what theatre had been to folks in the '70s, "certainly it was to me," and I liked Seema for what she accomplished for me,  I chatted with her some more before my thoughts started drifting to work and what I had to accomplish during the day.
Follow that Intuition, Its Priceless.

In all my previous posts I have laid special emphasis on Site Engineering and how it is accomplished, this post talks of the two methodologies of actual system sizing and the advantages of one over the other that is the Series System and the Parallel System.  So your Solar Mega Watt site is ready after you have accomplished site engineering, how did you size the system and design it :

1.  Series System

When current sources that is the modules themselves are wired in series, the voltages add up
Series circuits were the desired choice earlier

• Because most PV modules deliver power at voltages that range from 25-35 volts (the max power voltage, Vmp, for crystalline silicon modules) to 50 - 100Volts(Vmp for thin films).
• Most Inverters on the other hand require inbound voltages between 240-480 volts.
• Therefore designers must wire up in series so that the voltages add to high enough level for inverter.
• Most crystalline modules are wired in series, 8-12 at a time. Most thin film modules are series wired in groups of 5-6, known as strings.

Interestingly the upward limit of a string size is determined by the open circuit voltage (Voc) of the PV modules.  This value also must fall within the range of the inverter, and normally standard inverters with national governing body approval, upper voltage limit is normally 600 volts.  So for these inverters, the sum of the string's Voc must be under 600 volts.
Finally all strings are wired into a combiner box, which creates a parallel connection, this sums up the current while maintaining the same voltage.

For a 1 MW solar energy series system, the sizing would be as below :

Modules and strings
--------------------

• 13,334 modules of 75W each
• At 5 modules per string, the system will contain 2,667 strings
• Each string will require cabling from the PV modules back to the combiner box.  Normally this distance is about 150 feet so we can estimate the wire length based on number of strings: 2667 strings x 2 wires per string x 150 feet per wire run = 8,00,000 feet of wire.

Combiner Boxes
--------------

• The 2667 strings will also require combiner boxes: using 24 pole combiner boxes; the system would require 112 combiner boxes (2667/24 strings per combiner = 111.1 combiner boxes)

Labor
-----

• Labor associated with terminating the strings in the combiner boxes : 8 person hours to mount and fully install a 24 pole combiner box(including setting and fusing the string terminations).  Therefore there are 896 person hours of electrical labor embedded in the system.
• The cost of these components can show us the cost of the electrical BOS : assume Rs 18/foot for the wire of #10 gauge copper wire, Rs 60,000 for each combiner box and Rs 3900/hour for electrical installation labor.  The total electrical system cost(not counting the PV modules or inverter but everything in between) is Rs 2,59,58,400 or Rs 25.98/watt-peak.

While I was thinking and dreaming up analysing mega watt projects, I suddenly realised I still hadn't got the pricing of Solar PV module correct, the dollar to rupee differential had changed and while the a dollar traded to some fifty rupees just a month back, it was now trading at Rs 60, everything was very fluid, so I got into the act of calling some suppliers and here's what I came up with, now this might not be accurate enough, but if I quote a date to it, say 13/07/2013, it would make sense to a lot of people :


                                                          Solar PV Module
                                   

1.      Solar Module 200 watt ,18 Volt, 54 cells                      Rs 47.00/watt
2.      Solar Module 225 watt ,20 Volt, 60 cells                      Rs 48.00/watt
3.      Solar Module 230 watt ,20 Volt, 60 cells                      Rs 48.00/watt
4.      Solar Module 240 watt ,24 Volt, 60 cells                      Rs 47.00/watt
5.      Solar Module 250 watt ,24 Volt, 72 cells                      Rs 48.00/watt
6.      Solar Module 270 watt ,24 Volt, 72 cells                      Rs 47.00/watt
7.      Solar Module 280 watt ,24 Volt, 72 cells                      Rs 45.00/watt
8.      Solar Module 300 watt ,24 Volt, 72 cells                      Rs 49.00/watt

Now, I also noticed that the prices for higher wattage modules was relatively cheaper than the prices for lower wattage modules which was much higher going up to Rs 100/watt, this price I don't mention here due to lack of relevance to mega watt projects.

Given the life cycle of a solar project which goes upto 25 years that is 300 months, the product quality is of utmost important, the above price list was sourced from Synergy Electric.  The system design obviously plays a huge role in setting up a solar PV plant, for instance a 1 MW plant would require the following components, assuming two building blocks of 500 kW each :

1.  Photo Voltaic Array Strings.
2.  Sub-Array Combiner Box.
3.  Back Feed Protection.
4.  Surge Protection.
5.  2 nos 500 kW Inverters.
6.  AC Breakers.
7.  Integrated High Efficiency Transformer.
8.  AC Surge Protection.
9.  Interconnection Point.
10.Controls for Data Monitoring.

Combining the above mentioned system elements with an appropriate cabling will give a Mega Watt Design, but more on this later, if you have any feedback on this or need to give your inputs on this I can be reached at info@freshenergy.co or maninder.s.kumar@gmail.com

Sardar Satnam Singh was a pioneer, he had come from the erstwhile Pakistan during the partition and settled in a quaint little town called Patiala in India, during those days quaint little towns did not exist in Punjab, "like they do now, huh?," he was city goer and hated small towns.  Patiala of those days, "and it still is nowadays," was a bustling business town filled with people hoping to make it big, and Satnam Singh was one who did make it big, I knew him from the year 1975,"when I was old enough to realise who my relatives were," he was my uncle and I still remember him getting goodies for me whenever he visited us in Delhi.  I was in love with my uncle, "wasn't I in love with everybody those days," but this uncle of mine was brilliant, a small wiry man, on his return from Rawalpindi on partition, he started selling fruits.  Now that was a brilliant idea, if ever there was one, if the house ran out of rations, "so what if the business wasn't doing well," they could still eat fruits for dinner.  Business started doing well within a couple of years, even their pets, "the house was filled with the animals," started to eat fruit.

I woke up to a bright morning today, "and humid too, did I mention that," felt the AC waning a bit as I got into the car for my breakfast, McDonald's was not far, "far or not I would still reach it," about 10 minutes from home, so drove down to it and picked up two Hash Browns and a Coffee.  While I waited for me to be served at the counter, in came a lady, with a hint of white in her hair, and looking absolutely dignified, she had walked in behind me, I looked at her and wondered to myself what had got her here this early in the morning, maybe she worked around these parts, maybe she was just a wanderer like me, "and I do fancy myself as that," maybe she was just waiting for someone to come in, in any case when our eyes met, I said a Hi to her and she replied back, "howdy."  She mentioned something about the vent of the Air Con smelling and I agreed with her, we spoke for 10 minutes and then she went her way and I went mine, "which was upstairs to the seating."

After finishing off the breakfast, "and I didn't particularly like the coffee," I drove down to another suburb, to a Coffee Day Lounge, sat around with a Coffee, till another lady, younger and shouting on the telephone arrived, I immediately took notice, she had ordered Cold Coffee and Sachin who was at the counter gave her the best possible service, I thought about smiling to this one as well but held back, I was experienced enough in watching people to know when to smile and when to hold back, but surprisingly she smiled, "leaving me groping like a "Jimmy in a box,"  not used to getting smiled at by women, I was left wondering about the brightness of the morning, though going by the forecasts it was going to get cloudy soon.  I picked up my coffee and started to walk to her table, and then something stopped me again, I held back and walked past her to the counter and ordered exactly what she seemed to be having, a Cold Coffee.  Sachin smiled at me and gave me the best cold coffee he would make today, I carried it out to the car without speaking nodding a bye to him, he seemed happy, though his eyes were watery, "people cry for the vaguest of reasons, especially men.

I was off to my next destination, meeting some people for my business, the meetings were superb, I spoke to them and presented my case for installation of equipment at their site.  The presentations were well received, I was on my fourth cup of coffee by the time I finished my case studies, my head was aching and I was ready to leave the place, I had spent four hours on the road, in and out of cafes and meetings and the Sun was already taking its toll.  I suddenly realised how much I loved doing what I was doing what I was doing nowadays, and hoped that things wouldn't change too much over the coming months.
There is a Silver Lining to Every Cloud.

I had just completed the course, "the recommended one of course," and was looking for a job in my new field of expertise.  I was a dreamer they had told me and this was the right line for me, "the doorbells were ringing in my head," despite the fact that I had topped it, "aced it," I wasn't so sure about this, I wanted to bring about a change in my head, to realise that there was nothing this morning that would stop me from acing the interview as well.  I had started to work on the interview some 4 hours back, "damn them," wanted to figure out what they wanted from me and it was evidently clear that going by my degrees I was the candidate for the job, "like a degree mattered" but when it came to skills I was still learning.  To work as a translator or interpreter I needed a whole lot more than a degree, I needed real life skills and scenario handling capability, needed culture grounding and above all I needed to have interacted with people with similar skill set who had made it big in the industry.

I was waiting for my cup of coffee at the office, when I saw her, she was on the table next to me in the cafeteria, "God I hated this place," the decor here was depressing, and yet it was the only place to be to beat the summer heat and humidity.  She was drinking a cup of coffee too and talking in a foreign language on the phone,"foreign to people who didn't speak it of course," but I understood it, she was speaking my language and evidently enough adequately skilled at it.  As it turned out, she was a tall girl, over 6 feet and long straight hair and had beautiful face features, she looked almost foreign.  I got up from my table, while at the same time picking up a rose from the vase on it, and walked over to hers, and said, "¿Puedo unirme a ustedes," she nodded her added in agreement and I sat on her table and we started to talk the language.

She was skilled, really skilled and, I had difficulty keeping pace with her, almost jumped foot in my mouth with most sentences, "I have a large mouth in any case," but this time I kept it shut and listened to her speak.  There was another guy on the table, probably her boyfriend, "who didn't like my presence," and he didn't understand a word of what was being said, "but saw it right to nod nonetheless," every time she looked at him.  I didn't like the guy too much, and told her in the language, she laughed out loud and looked at him again, he nodded again.

This much I garnered from her, that to be skilled at the language, I needed the following things :

1.  Real Time Skills.
2.  Should have taught somewhere.
3.  Meet people from the culture.
4.  Travel to the country of origin.

I asked her for her phone number and she was quick to hand it over, "call me anytime," she said, "You have been a great help," I answered back, "hope to see you again," and we parted ways.  It had been the one most productive hour of my life.
Peer Support, Nothing Beats It.

I had been seeing Anjali for over 6 months now, she was smart and vivacious and extremely hard working, on the occasional day she would come up with ideas that rocked my boat, I got the distinct feeling that she was working hard at keeping my mind busy with ideas, "and I often got the Sales block," on some days, my pitch would go awry and leads would fritter away.  Today she had had another brainwave, and she started to work on me, suggesting that I get my friend Gaurav together with her friend Shivani,"and the four of us make merry," I wasn't so sure, getting two unknown folks to see eye to eye is never easy. In any case I convinced Gaurav and we all met at a restaurant in the suburbs.  I had driven down with Anjali while Gaurav and Shivani arrived on their own.

It was just the beginning and just as I thought, the conversation was uneasy, "and I wasn't helping," I was too busy eating my Italian pasta to notice their discomfort, Anjali kept poking me,"but damn this pasta was too good."  Gingerly, I dragged myself away from my plate,"it was a masterpiece," with white sauce peppered with seasoning on top, and began to talk. "Gaurav is into advertising," I said breaking the ice for Shivani, "Oh! I see," she popped back.  She had been staring at her plate of Risotto for quite a while, "like she wanted to devour it," and yet not sure, Anjali then joined in and we went on to rant about Gaurav's job and how good he was at it.  It's funny, when strangers meet they always begin with their work before they get down to the job knowing each other, "and that's the personal bit," though I had never talked work with Anjali since I met her, we had always hit off on the personal note.  Gaurav looked uncomfortable with all the praise,"damn he could have been over the moon," and he did look a little warily at me, " like I didn't praise him often enough," I must admit my focus for over the last six months had been somewhere else," at the women sitting on my right."

Gaurav started off thereafter explaining his work and his accounts and Anjali kept popping in with the right comments and questions.  I returned back to my pasta, "the last few bites are often the best."  My thoughts drifted to the first time I had met Anjali, I had asked her about her parents, her siblings and her life in general.  She had replied in all honesty and that had been the basis of our relationship.  It had started of with me doing all the talking and then she had taken over the responsibility, we would often go on long drives with her explaining to me the intricacies of life, hers and more so mine, I was older but she would mama over me and from time to time, clearing the jargon from my head and putting rational thoughts into it.  She was the more practical out of the two of us, the realist and she understood me, just like I was beginning to understand her.

When I came out my reverie, Gaurav and Shivani were in rapt conversation, she liked him obviously and Gaurav was strutting around like a peacock, stretching her imaginations with his flowery words.  Gaurav wasn't that open with women but he was getting all the right words today and he sounded fabulous,"too good to be true, isn't it," she sounded so sure now, Anjali knew it had been the right decision to bring these people together, now the both of us smugly stared at each other while the two of them had a mutual admiration society running.
Stranger Do I Know You

I had been waiting at the doorsteps for an hour, when suddenly it happened, the door opened from the inside as someone woke up to let me in.  It was 6 am in the morning and it all started with a party invitation that I had accepted, "thoughtfully though," it was a house party that required me to be dressed in a costume.  I had chosen Batman as the idol and gone ahead and got myself stitched a costume, "including the cape, would you believe it," it looked horrendously pale in front of the other inmates of the house party.  They were all dressed in bright clothing, there was a bee, "from some comic book," there was the princess,"they be damned," and another one even looked like the Man Of Steel.  I started to think I was looking bizarrely out of place when in walked another caped crusader, The Bat Girl, "and she sure was a sight for sore eyes."

We hit it off instantly, and stayed at the house party for just an hour, moved on to the suburban metropolitan looking for pubs to drown our combined sorrow,"didn't I say we looked out of place," and bizarrely so.  She was a housewife on a rampage, I was a sales and marketing guy looking to make it big,"both drowned in liquor," of all variety and me drunk and she not one bit,"damn that fakey stuff," I was sure I made a sorry sight in front of her and she looked fabulous with the mask on.  Would you believe it, I still hadn't seen her face, my mask was down of course, "as it normally is after a couple of drinks," I had told her all my big dreams and she had soaked it in, "as well as what she was having,  We talked really well and it showed, I was wondering after 4 hours on the street with her, whether it was possible to like someone so much without seeing her face, "the faceless crusader," more likely killer cause she had me totally floored.  I would have done anything for her for that one last drink, "and we had had 4 last drinks," it was 4 am in the morning when I dropped her off at her flat, "still faceless," at the doorstep she stopped and turned around and said, "See ya soon," and walked in.

On my way back home I took the longer way home, "damn I didn't have the keys to the house," and I had some thinking to do, this had never happened to me before, "falling in love again mister," and it was our first four hours together and she was still faceless.  How could it be that I was falling for a faceless stranger, my heartbeats increased every time i thought of her, and I had no feel to go by, I hadn't seen the face just the soul of stranger that had choreographed with me to tunes unheralded.  For me, she had been brilliance personified, a totally magnificent princess,"here I go again," to be put on a pedestal and worshipped.  She was my beauty queen who would win all beauty pageants if she ever chose to participate, and I had to convince her that I was the prince who would carry her off on my splendid white horse.  Still dreaming,  I reached home  and suddenly the door opened from the inside, I was in time for a quick bath and breakfast and then sleep for eternity in my new dreamworld.
Stay Blind, Have Faith, Be Happy.

As a corollary to my previous post on Mega Watt Design, where I illucidated the 7 steps to designing and implementing a mega watt site, here is the next step in the process, namely, Site Engineering.  This is a very critical part of the whole process where the site is engineered according to the survey report and equipment chosen to reflect the basis of the engineering process.  Here, listed below are the two critical components of site engineering :

Site Engineering Basics
1.  Identify constraints with setting up foundations for the PV racks.
2.  Identify Differential setting of the landscape or the slope, whether it would change
     once the racks are fitted onto the foundation.

Though the above may sound complicated, it is easy as a daisy for a Site Engineer to figure this one out, and here is how we overcome the constraints :

1. Proper PV Selection.
2. Proper System Design.

Selecting the proper PV process and Proper System Design require that we start with the Site Preparation Engineering Process, the report of which has been seen in the site survey which analysed and deduced the soil composition and the lay of the land, the Site Preparation Engineering Process consists of the following parts :

Site Engineering Process
1. Clearing up the site.
2. Filling and Grading.
3. Compaction.
4. Tree roots of retrofit sites hold the soil together and will require a strategy to pull them out, for instance the tree trunk will need to be cut at the cap level.
4. Site will have to be graded and filled with top soil to even out the slope in places to achieve uniform cap depth.
5. It may not always be necessary to get a zero slope.
6. After it has been graded it may be necessary to be compacted to provide a solid base for the solar array.

Once the necessary Site Engineering has happened comes the interesting part,  the PV Equipment and Drawing board design :
Listed below are the PV system configurations available at low cost in the market today :

PV System Configurations
1. Fixed Tilt (rack mounted with the panels installed to a fixed angle)
Lighter in weight/less expensive/produce less energy per KW
2.    Single Axis Tracking Mounting Systems
Track the sun around one axis.
Use an actuator system that rotates an axle.
        Are Heavier/more expensive/produce more energy per kW.

Two other criterion for determining PV System Configuration is Pier Depth and differential settlement.


Installing a fixed tilt system

1. Pier and Footing Configuration
Holes drilled in the soil concrete footings poured into the bottom of the hole
then piers attached to the concrete footings and racks attached to the piers.
        The depth of the pier is determined by the dead weight point loads supported by the piers and                       footings.  Typically the pier depth can be as less as 3 feet particularly if light
                weight panels are used.
       
                As an alternative a concrete slab could be poured to the entire length and width of the of the solar                 array and then mounting the array on it.  This would increase the cost of the project as also weight                 to the surface.

2. The Type of PV panel
Mono/Poly Silicon
higher efficiency/weigh more/cost more per watt
Thin Films
lower efficiency/weigh less/cost less per watt

3. Wind Loading
Industry standard is 120 mph winds.
Piers and racks of significant gauge steel to withstand high wind.
Designing the mounting structures so that the panels are mounted
                closed to ground can help mitigate the damage from high winds.

These factors, if taken into consideration and evolved well enough will give a long lasting PV System that will have the benefits accruing to the customer.  In my next post I will go more specifically into the actual design of the components for the Megawatt park.

I am but a novice in the field and the purpose is to write a book on Solar Sales, any information with regards that you might want to pass along, as well any mention of what you intend this book to look like will be deeply appreciated.  I am available at info@freshenergy.co or maninder.s.kumar@gmail.com

I was thinking as I waited for her at the bus stop, "like the rest them were here just waiting huh ?," we were all lost in our thoughts thinking of stories to tell back home or just thinking of our life of today, some were even talking to strangers to get over the boredom,"and damn that makes us talk," I was just thinking of Anjali as I waited for her.  I had met Anjali some months back and liked her, "to like a woman, that was rare nowadays," I hardly met women I liked, she was vivacious and talkative and I had to convince her to believe in what I believed, she wouldn't take my word for it.  I on the other hand was married and bored, "aren't we all when we are married," I looked forward to my interactions with her, they relieved my boredom, I was even thinking of getting romantically involved with her, "sex was on my mind."

I was still thinking these pretty thoughts when she walked into sight carrying an umbrella to ward of the rain, she looked smart and beautiful as usual, I loved the sight of her walking, slow walk with all the right moves, she was tall this girl and knew how to carry herself, "she reminded me of the camel," a long distance runner and a fighter to the core.  All her life she had fought adversities, "and none better for it," she smiled as she walked up to me.  She sat next to me under the awning of the bus stop.  It was late and raining and I knew she had something to tell me and as usual she was direct, "I want to get married to you." I sat there stunned,"did I hear this right ?" or were my ears playing tricks, was it the rain, "normally I am a sane person and takes a lot to stun me," she said it again, "I want to get married to you."

"I am dying," were her next words, stunned into silence I didn't know what to say, what did she mean, "married", "dying", what was going on here.  "I am dying and I want to marry you before I die," she said forming a fully coherent sentence finally.  I looked at her and my tears began to flow, I suddenly realised that the first thing she had said to me didn't mean a thing to me, but the second, "the dying part if you still didn't get it," had me in a watery grave, "analogies be damned," I didn't want her to go anywhere than planet Earth, she had to stay with me, talk to me for the rest of my life, "or so I believed," but obviously life had other ideas, "it didn't like me happy," I hadn't even asked her what she was dying of, "it seemed so inconsequential," the monumental fatalistic statement she had made so matter of fact, seemed to suggest she had thought this one out and I was ready to listen to more.

So if she was dying, would I want to marry her, this life was barely ticking, all thoughts of its endlessness had been dismissed in the first five minutes of our conversation, I was still crying and through the haze of tears, the answer came to me, "this damn procrastinator," had found an answer within five minutes of the conversation.  I would marry her, the rest of my life was consigned to "the waiting room," so inconsequential and wasteful that I couldn't think of it as productive.  I was stunned out of thoughts, she was shaking my arm, "So will you, do you love me ?"
The feeling of imminent or actual loss is more powerful than one of possession.

Designing a Mega Watt Solar site will require a host of things to be in place and these typically include a Site Survey, Preliminary Engineering Design, identifying the correct PV Module, Inverter and BOS Equipment, PV system design and specifications, the output of the solar system and a finally a break even analysis.  The following tasks listed below provide the basics of the design methodology :

1. Conduct a Site Survey.
2. Analysis of the Environment and other Certificates to be obtained.
3. Site Engineering Analysis
4. Determine PV System Size, drawing board Design and Specifications.
5. Initial Costing of the PV farm.
6. Conduct a Break Even Analysis and other Working Economics of the farm.
7. Project Report.

In this post I will try and analyse the first point in the above list, that is the site survey, and take the other points later in other posts, there are possibly a million things to survey if the mega watt site is located within or close to the city premises. As you would be aware, a retrofit always more difficult to handle than say, putting up the PV farm in a desert.  The following points are important when the PV farm site is a retrofit :


1.   Is the site approachable by road ?

2.   Is the site approachable by foot ?

3.   The density of the trees and bush landscape on the site?
     
4.   Location of utility services like police stations, hospitals etc around the site ?
     
5.   Load carrying capacity of Distribution lines around the site ?
      The electricity generated by the PV park would have to be fed back into the grid, having low capacity           distribution lines around the park would imply an upgrade and having no distribution lines would mean           installation of the right capacity distribution lines.

6.  Will the site need to be cleared and graded ?

7.  Is south facing areas of the site clear of shading ?

8.  Which side will provide more public relations benefit to the promoters ?
      It would be more interesting to provide a front side view of the panels to any road traffic close by and           would make for good public relations, a green technology is welcomed across the world.

9.  Which location on the site will give the park more adequate access to security ?

10. If there is a forest around the site what location will not disturb the "urban forest" beauty ?

11. What is the slope of the site ?

As I got into the second class compartment of this train, I had a sense of doom, "prophecies be damned," I had done this 1500 km trip so many times and yet today, "and this dang thing was always on time," I was unsure, I was weak and trembling, weak in my head, " fear attacks it first."  I had just finished a round of talks with my in-laws for eight years and the talks hadn't gone off too well, "like it ever does with the in-laws," for the first time in my life I had very little money,"its always about the money isn't it," they had insisted that I leave their daughter behind with them and go on to live my life without her.  I had travelled 200 kms to the station and got on to this train alone, nobody had come to drop me, "it was time for a reality check son," my mind shouted at me and I had to agree with my mind.  It wasn't going to help to remember the past, if a divorce was near, "acceptance is better than penitence," and I had been told in irrevocable terms that they wanted it to happen.

I was still thinking, "as I was apt to those days," when the train started to move, I looked at my co-passengers and there was only one pretty face is sight, the rest of them were men, she had a baby with her,  probably a three year old toddler, she looked comfortable in her skin, like a woman totally in control of her life, I liked the sight of her instantly but was wary of talking or smiling a hi.  Amongst the other passengers was a young lad, probably about 24 years, another gentleman not older than 30 and the rest of the two non-descript faces, as is so often in a train like this.  Earlier, Raina had insisted that I make this trip down to my in-laws and I mentally made a note to thank her for the reality check, I am a procrastinator and would never have made this trip had it not been for her, she had been right about a lot of things and I was beginning to like her point of view.  This lady in the compartment reminded me of Raina a lot, confident and complete, a woman at ease with her sexuality, knowing fully well that she was beautiful and people would stare at her.

This was a forty hour journey, and I knew I would get lot of time to reflect, "and deflect," any random thoughts that might stray, "actually astray," to my sub consciousness, I started to concentrate on the lady with the toddler, watching her, "it was better than watching anything else," she was making her toddler drink some water, and talking to the young guy, I gleaned from their conversation that her name was Geeta and she was a resident of Mathura, a township close to Delhi, some two hours away and that she was married to an air force pilot, "I do have very sharp ears," and she was good watching material.  Raina had made me immune to the need of wanting to have a conversation with people, I was perfectly content lonely and just the way I was, no need to talk, just watch people and enjoy the play of emotion on their faces.

I was enjoying my activity when it happened, I felt a buzz in my head, "and I wasn't drunk either," I felt my head sag and allowed it to momentarily and then lifted my head to rest it on the cushion at the back.  The tension of the last two days was taking its toll, I could feel the sweat as it rolled down my forehead onto my cheeks, "like somebody had lit a bomb up in my head," something in my body was not right.  I gingerly managed to climb up to the top berth and plonked myself on it.  Don't know what happened for the next thirty six hours, I kept trying to wake up and my head wouldn't respond, my legs and arms wanted to move but my head just wasn't there, "somebody couldn't very well have cut it," because I felt no blood.  I just slept the hours through, my phone was ringing constantly during this period, mostly Raina trying to get in touch, "Are You Ok," messages, I didn't have the feel to even write back to even a single one, "feel be danged, I was dead to the world," the train could have taken me to Timbuktu and I wouldn't have cared, but somebody who cared was waiting in Delhi, I managed to get off at the platform to see Raina.
It takes a lot to revive a dead horse and flogging doesn't help.

The journey began with a thought, Agra, the Taj Mahal, "wasn't it the place love was epitomised", stupid cupid stop hitting on me, love was the last thing on my mind, more like this lack of activity was bothering my "hiney", planted in one place for long it developed these red spots not to mention a few other things.  I was eager,"beaver be damned", as they come and decided I was going to make that trip this time.  Otherwise, I am a big time procrastinator and left on my own, have a "time on my hands, will do this later" kind of attitude.  The last big time procrastination I remember was conveniently forgetting, "to keep my wife happy".  A marriage is a full time occupation and forgetting "to procreate" is a recipe for,"The Princess Diana" Syndrome.

So I borrowed my friend's Tata Safari, its a remarkable fighting machine, and  it sure does  pack a mean punch not to mention a good, "package space", picked up my package, Shalini, from the office in Chattarpur, Delhi and rode off to the proverbial misty blue mountains, "never had been to Agra you see", wherever they were in Agra.  The car started to move superbly, and then I hit the, "So you think you getting ahead of me, huh?", typical Delhi traffic.  Shalini was talking like a princess that she is, "damn Diana again," I thought to myself and continued to drive slowly, it was painstaking getting out of Delhi, took a detour through Kalkaji and stopped to pick up snacks, she wanted fruit, "would you believe that ?" I mean who in the world thinks of Alphonsos' in peak North Indian heat.  In any case, picked up the snacks and moved on further towards Noida DND, the music was soothing, I like the kind that "3 Doors Down" plays and had it to a reasonable blast, the AC was churning out cold air and Shalini some lovely thoughts of To Do's in Agra.

The corridor to Agra through Greater Noida is called the Yamuna Expressway and is a 165 km stretch, six lane highway, and once we hit the expressway there was no looking back, I expected to do the stretch in two hours which is no mean feat, "UP is crowded", and travelling through it is a pain normally.  I love the idea of driving non-stop and fast, the Safari was in its elements on the highway, a mean fighting machine as mentioned before it can travel long stretches without stopping, I was chastising Varun mentally, if only he had thought of putting a refrigerator in the damn car, I knew I was cursing for the wrong reasons, "I was on borrowed time" and beggars can't be choosers can they ?  The scenery was zipping by, and my conversation with Shalini was turning into monosyllables, "huh me ? monosyllables," lucky Shalini !, she decided to concentrate on the music and put in another CD of old Hindi songs, "Damn now I would have to slow down," I thought to myself, before I went to sleep on the wheel.  "Kya hua tera Vaada" asked the stereo and I slowed down to have a drink of water, mentally thinking of what had I promised myself, that I would make this as interesting for her as possible, this was going to be our trip.  I patted her on the knee and pointed to a sugarcane plantation on the left.

We had slowed down and could see in the distant a sugarcane plantation, reminded me of an old Madhuri Dixit Hindi movie song, "Channey key khet mein", not that I was thinking of solving all my marital problems with a "roll in the haystack", though it was an interesting thought, however it would certainly make for an interesting team activity to jump over the rails and bite our teeth into some fresh sweet sugarcane.  She was game and we both got out, jumped over the guard rail and ran to the field carefully avoiding the traffic.  I plucked a cane out for her and one for me, and we ran back to the car, flush with excitement like kids.  I started the car before the farmers got a hint of our "nefarious" activity and ran down the expressway spewing dust, actually more likely "burning rubber", there was surprisingly very little dust on this expressway.

Once our stash was in the car, it was back to driving fast and furious, "I kinda like the movie," with music full blast, "Top of the World",  this sugarcane robbing duo, "not counting the lean mean fighting machine," churned up miles, singing and kicking up a hue inside the Safari, between munching on biscuits and chips and gnawing our teeth on Sugarcane, we reached the destination in the planned time, the Tata Safari had been superb and now it was time for another stroll, "this damn thing doesn't manoeuvre well in traffic," through the city of Agra.  Traffic, smoke and people all milling around made me wish the Taj was on the expressway rather than the city, "I mean, Shahjahan should have known".

So here I was lying midway on my staircase, "No, I hadn't sold off my bed," thinking to myself and cursing my old slippers, "Oh, and you thought I was in love with them," these slippers had betrayed me today,"damn why do we fall in love ?" I was in pain and couldn't move, I knew I had to,"after all I had a walk to go to didn't I," and get to a doctor.  I had slipped ten steps on the old staircase, the house was empty, I was alone, the only sound was of my own labored breathing and this wicked staircase had claimed another victim.  Just 2  months ago somebody else in the family had slipped on it,"spilled some good tea too," and almost broken their neck.  Lying in the prostrate position that I was, I wasn't sure whether I had broken my neck, "and if I had there were no angels singing over my halo," but my back pained badly.  I turned to the right to get my hand out of under me and try and apply some pressure on it to get back up, "Aaahhh," the scream was involuntary and my mind broke up into a million pieces under the pain.  It shattered my peace so thoroughly, I had been cool and calm when just lying on this staircase, "wicked too," and just the bare movement of a muscle caused ten thousands needles to prick my back.  Fortunately I hadn't fainted or lapsed into unconciousness, I picked myself up somehow and limped to the couch and plonked myself on to it.

It pained even to lie down, what was I to do, do I call Raina, I thought immediately but she lived far off and by the time she reached here I might be dead already, she might even have a heart attack thinking of me lying here all alone with a bad back,"it wasn't broken, I could walk."  On a hunch I called her, she picked up after two rings, "I am dead," I said in an uneven tone, and then went on to explain what had happened, my voice was cracking up even as I spoke, she hushed me up and promised she would be there in 1/2 hour, "whats half between life and death," I thought to myself, I continued lying on the couch, if I managed to curl up my legs and outstretched my arms it was weirdly comforting.  In 15 minutes at the couch, I was up again and limped to the medicine cabinet, I took out Anacin, the only pain killer I found with me and popped in three of them, "self prescription, but damn did I have a choice," and curled up again on the couch and waited.  There was this dream I was seeing when suddenly the door bell rang.

It was Raina, "and she sure was a sight for sore eyes," as she walked in and started mothering around me and realising that the situation could get out of hand, "to put it minorly," immediately helped me to the car. "The keys," I shouted, "I have got them," why did I remember all these things now, "how about the medical kit," I pointed to the medicine cabinet, "We don't need it now," she shouted back.  I was blabbering like a new born baby, "wailing is the right word," as I managed to cram myself up into the cars front seat.  If I didn't reach the hospital fast enough, I thought I was going to faint, "my back seemed to cramping," and I was swooning, "in love again huh?" I managed a seat belt, though I was sure nobody dare stop us with me wailing like a banshee all the way to the clinic.

The doctor turned out to be young guy, and he had a female intern with him, they poked my back like I was some specimen from Pluto and pronounced me not fit to move, "at least the way I am used to," for a month.  It seems I had a muscle split near the side of my back, "why was I thinking of my freaking neck then," and it would require pain killers, the prescription variety and muscle re-builders to get me up on my feet like I was used to.  I got up, "actually they wouldn't let me sit," and walked down with Raina to the medical shop, bought the medicine and she drove me back home to sleep peacefully.
Of Friends and Then Some

As I waited for Raina at the Green Park Metro Station, I casually flicked through the morning newspaper, "not that it held any charms," I had picked it up for free at the IIT crossing close by, the Hindustan Times was going to be free for a week,  "surprise surprise," it wasn't a newspaper that I read too much though, just that it was free had me with it.  I was working as a consultant for a company that made software, and it didn't make me very happy, "software sales, whoever did that," because it was all accomplished online.  I had a freedom to chose my time, though they shut at 9 pm"didn't like that very much," would have much preferred a night shift, at least that would leave the day free to write and I didn't like the tag of a consultant too much, "it sounded like somebody who would advice on things that he hadn't done," I didn't like the job much, except for Raina, my buddy who still gave me hope after six months.  Marketing software is like marketing FMCG, "it stinks of a soap opera," the repeats are interminable, and gave me a bad taste in the mouth, the characters change but when you look at the story line, its still the same.

I did it all for them, from making software sales to Small Shops to Top Notch CEOs, interacting with the developers for pre-sales and post sales glitches.  There are normally enough glitches in any software in the first version that it sends alarm bells through the salesman brain, so the next time you have a heavy session with your girlfriend, there is this feeling of doom in your head even before you begin.  On top of that, the developer is a prime ass, who thinks he has created the "Windows" version Bill Gates dreams of, never once giving you a hint of the bugs during the demonstration.  Raina didn't like me struggling with the developers, she always told me, "focus on sales," forget these guys and just do your job.  Though easier said than done, I had decided to so exactly what she had told me.

As Raina walked into the Metro Station, I was happy to see her, "hi dumbo," she called out, as always she looked great and put all the other women to shame, "damn she could call me anything," she had this carefree feel about her that was hard to pin down.  "Coffee or Tea," I asked her, "Tea," she was a tea addict and could make you drink it in all kinds of flavours.  The ride to Connaught Place in the Metro was an eventful one, "as if most rides in the metro aren't," she was full of anecdotes from her evening with her family and  I kept her engrossed with all my regular pep talk of how it was important to stay away from negativity," I must have sounded like Deepak Chopra," and to be positive about most things in life, also most things in life are free, like the air we breath, however, even if they were chargeable it wouldn't hurt to bring them to somehow into our circle of influence.  After all life was about discounts, and if somebody gave us a 10% discount on the water we drank for talking more then it made sense to talk.  A 5% or 10% discount was what we wanted from most things in life, a trust that was built on word of mouth rather than the written document.  Training to be a better person was more important than thinking of being an important person, and in the event of goals not achieved it would still give the feel of having reached somewhere.
Sometimes Having Goals is More Important Than Reaching Them.

So here I was on the 100th day, still here and still waiting, "Damn could this possibly be a weighty problem," for somebody to call, it had been hundred days since I had spoken to her.  It was mid October and more than 3 months had gone by since the fight, "didn't somebody say, I am a lover not a fighter," well, I felt like a nobody today.  Hundred days and still counting, I somehow had hope, but I knew the call wouldn't happen for a while.  I couldn't call, "of course I still had my mobile," but I had been summarily told not to call, I knew if she had said that then she meant it. I was going through the worst phase in my  life, "or so I thought," work was there but I wasn't there mentally, there were people all around me but they meant nothing and it was work and then back home, the routine that had been around for 100 days, no diversions to cafes and bistros, just a drive to work and then a drive home.

I had stopped thinking at work, "I was Isaac Asimov's Robot personified," I thought to myself, people who think they know a lot were a complete nuisance to me today.  I hadn't spoken about this to anyone,"the robot part of course," why was I a character out of Asimov's book today, they thought I was too lost in my own thoughts.  Though there were a number of theories going around, some of which included, a) Going through male menopause, "is that a myth by the way," b) Too much work,"like I was drowning in it," c)trying to cultivate the distant look, "like I wasn't too aloof already," all the theories like balderdash to me, I hadn't spoken openly to anybody in days, except for this girl in the HR department, Raina, she seemed quite open and I spoke to her the first thing in the morning everyday and then before leaving work.  We spoke about nothing actually, about lunch and dinners, about likes and dislikes, just general talk and yet it was comforting, "certainly not a nuisance this one."

Interesting, those days I had evolved a theory around how to tell people about what was going on in my life without really mentioning names or incidences, I evolved stories, and passed it on to Raina during our conversations.  Small things I missed about "my 100 days girl," like for instance what she liked eating, our favourite eating joint, the friendship and bond, Raina understood some of it, though she kept nodding her head to everything I said, I was sure she thought all that I was saying was me, "obviously since I hadn't taken the name, these days I was more prone to loneliness and my talks with Raina helped ease the pain.  Let me describe Raina to you, she was a thin small girl, not frail though, with short shoulder length hair, vivacious, loved to talk and on her first job.  I must have sounded like her father, though I get along with the younger generation quite well, but I certainly felt like a father to her, sometimes protective and other times indulgent.

Now when I look back, I tend to wonder whether Raina herself was going through some kind of trauma that she didn't tell me about, I was so lost in my pain, it never occurred to me to ask.  I know I should have asked because I had become so self centred on my pain that I didn't see other people in pain, maybe I should have helped the one who had helped me overcome my darkest hour.  Then suddenly it was February, the winters were giving way to the warm sunny weather, and my pain dissipated every time I saw Raina's face, "damn I know what you thinking," that here we go from one attachment to another, though this time I realised how much a complete person I am when I am alone, dealing with loneliness would never be a problem again.
You sure can't beat Peer Support.